Tales of the Unsavory

This fool here!!!!

2011-01-14T15:19:00.003-05:00

It has been a mighty long time since the Unsavory Charlatans have made an appearance, however too much is happening now to look away. What in THE world was "this fool here" thinking when he had AN ICE CREAM CONE tattooed on his face!

I don't care what anyone says, not even his MOTHER loves this mess. On top of the fact that his name is "Gucci Mane" - for this act of pure stupidity, you sir are.....
COMPLETELY UNSAVORY!!!!

Religious Zealots

2010-01-14T09:24:00.003-05:00

The unsavory charlatans are spiritual people. We don't attend service every week, but we do believe there is a higher power and His hand has a reach in our daily lives - for better or for worse. However, when we hear IDIOTS like Rush Limbaugh and and Pat Robertson spew the utter ridiculousness that came out of their mouths on Wednesday regarding Haiti - it gives us pause and reaffirms that not everyone or everything that proclaims to be Christian acts in Christ like ways!

Limbaugh said -"keep your wallet closed, because, 'We've already donated to Haiti. It's called the U.S. income tax."

Robertson said - "Haiti's pact with the Devil is to blame for the earthquake."

I want to know at what point in their Wednesday morning prayers did these two thing it was a good idea to share "this view" with the world. Mr. Limbaugh and Mr. Robertson - you two are BEYOND unsavory.

While no official count has been issued, it is estimated that tens of thousands have lost their lives. Many more are unaccounted for, including Unsavory Charlatan #1's choir director's mother. How a tragedy such as this, can be used for political and gain of fame is beyond me.

Thankfully, no one else from the crew from the LOL - Likes of Limbaugh have issued absurd statements but time will only tell.

The Unsavory Charlatans have contributed to Wylclef Jean's Yele Foundation to assist with the effort and hope that you have too.

And These People Have Real Jobs Part 3...

2009-05-18T15:23:00.002-04:00

-----Original Message-----

Subject: Donut Sale!!!

NEWS!!! NEWS!!! AND MORE NEWS!!!

Great day XXXXXXXX:

We are taking advantage of every opportunity that present itself to continue building the Team. On Sunday, May 24, 2009 (yes Memorial Day weekend) we are requesting volunteers to help us sale donuts. The times we have schedule is 7:45am and 11:45am services.

Feel free to come and worship with them during their services as well. Please let me know if you are available to support the TEAM!!!

Thanks…

“ONE CAN CHASE A THOUSAND AND TWO PUT TEN THOUSAND TO FLIGHT”

And These People Have Real Jobs Part 2....

2009-05-18T15:20:00.003-04:00

Great day XXXXXXXXXXX:

Can you all say Fundraiser? Yes, that right Fundraiser!!! Effective as of yesterday we have launched out to build the Track Team by selling the Brax Spirit Cups with all 32 NFL and 30 MLB teams along with 70 Colleges and 5 Military designs. Don’t miss the opportunity to be part of something growing there’s a time to build up and a time to tear down and we are going to build up for the Kingdom of GOD!!!

If you have not gotten your order form or forms, please don’t hesitate to see me at track practice. Thanking you in advance for your support in making this Fundraiser (Why is fundraiser always capitalized!?!?) a SUCCESS!!!

“MAKING A DIFFERENCE ONE TEAM AT A TIME”

And These People Have Real Jobs.....

2009-05-18T15:16:00.005-04:00

RR NEWS!!! RR NEWS!!! RR NEWS REPORT!!!

Great day XXXXXXXXXXXXXX,

Due to the weather we had not been able to fully practice as much as we should. However, today seem to be a pretty good day to get back on the ball so there will be practice “TODAY” WEDENSDAY, MAY 6, 2009 AT 6:00PM – UNTIL 8:00PM!!! I would like to stress per my conversation with Coach Gunter that this season we will be competing with some strong and determine to win teams. And my all means we have that same determination but, we want you to encourage your Star Athletes that practice makes perfect and perfect leads to perfection. In saying all that the qualifiers will be coming up soon and we don’t want NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND!!!(ALL time favorite line!) Our motto will be “PUMP” as Pam would say which means in my terminology

P = Push
U = Until
M = Master
P = Perfection

Thanks for your cooperation and if you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact the Coaches or Board Members. Have a Productive Day!!!

The Octomom Costume Kit

2009-04-03T15:50:00.003-04:00

HILARIOUS! I am concerned about Ernie lurking in the background...he looks like a pervert!

Friday Facebook Funnies!

2009-03-20T16:27:00.004-04:00

1. Pot, please meet kettle!
A) why I have to deal wit a less then inteligent baby momma. Sorry but I calls it how I see it!?

2. What is this word?
B) is a smidget overwhelmed...just a smidget! whew...

3. Seriously?
C) Is reading Steve Harvey's best-seller...and learning soo much...we women really have no clue...lol....

4. Why?
D) Is out and about, holla if you need tickets for NC Fashion Week!

This IDIOT right here

2009-03-03T23:45:00.001-05:00

How do you spell J-A-C-K-A-S-$!? Just ask your local Barista.....I guess he learned nothing from Plaxico Burress huh? ROTFLMAO!

Starbucks Barista Pops a Cap in His Leg

WASHINGTON -- A barista at the Starbucks in the 1600 block of U Street NW accidentally shot himself in the leg Tuesday afternoon. The employee was hospitalized with non-life-threatening injuries. He's facing an unlawful possession of a firearm charge.

The barista's motive for carrying the weapon to work is unknown.

Police are investigating.

This comes as Congress considers a voting rights bill with an amendment that would strip the District of most local gun-control laws. Whether passage of such a law would increase self-inflicted barista wounds or decriminalize the shooting of oneself in the leg remains to be seen.

I don't want nuggets, I want a refund!

2009-03-03T23:21:00.004-05:00

The comedy of this story is out of this world. Please listen to the call. "She say she are the manager!" We can't make this stuff up!

Woman Calls 911 3 Times Over McNuggets
http://news.aol.com/article/911-mcnuggets-call/367995

FORT PIERCE, Fla. (March 3) - Authorities say a Florida woman called 911 three times after McDonald's employees told her they were out of McNuggets. A police report said 27-year-old Fort Pierce resident Latreasa L. Goodman told authorities she paid for a 10-piece last week but was later informed the restaurant had run out.

She says she was refused a refund and told all sales were final. A cashier told police she offered Goodman a larger portion of different food for the same price, but Goodman became irate. Police say Goodman was cited on a misuse of 911 charge. A current phone listing for Goodman couldn't be found.

A McDonald's spokesman says Goodman should have been given a refund, and she's being sent a gift card for a free meal.

Courtesy of TMZ.com- Listen to the calls - http://www.tmz.com/2009/03/03/mcnuggett-911-calls-the-unhappy-meal-drama

Parents just don't understand ???

2009-02-25T09:59:00.002-05:00

Now my parents used to say on various occasions that they wanted to smack the crap out of me, lock me in my room or some other over exaggerated notion because I'd done something to piss them off. NEVER, did they appear to want to REALLY resort to violence. Apparently, this father in "B-MORE careful" must have had enough!!!! Sir - you are very UNSAVORY!!!!

___________

http://wjz.com/local/man.stabbing.church.2.942499.html

BALTIMORE (AP) - Police said a 58-year-old man stabbed his teenage son after he refused to take off his hat at church earlier in the day. The father and his 19-year-old son got into an argument on Sunday afternoon. That's when police said the father went to a car, got a knife and stabbed his son in the left buttock and fled. (I bet his azz will take that hat off next time, I know - sorry! LOL)

The son was taken to University of Maryland Medical Center for treatment. The father's name was withheld pending his arrest.

THE BEST EMAIL EVER

2009-02-24T16:04:00.005-05:00

I received this email from someone trying to rent a house. This is the BEST email I have every received in my life!!! I SWEAR it is real! I had tears, real tears of laughter falling from my eyes and the sad thing about it there are people falling for this crap!

Hello Dear,

Thanks for the email and it is my gladness hearing from you.i am the owner of the house you are making enquiry of.Actually I resided in the house with my family,such as my wife and my only daugther before and presently we had packed due to my transfer from my working place and now situated in the (West Africa Nigeria) and presently my house is still available for rent ..including the utilities like hydro,washerand security,it is furnised but if u which to move in with your furnishes no problem.. i went for a Crusade in the West Africa .

Pls i want you to note that,i am a kind and honest man and also i spent alot on my property that i want to give you for rent,i will want you to take absolute maintenance of my house and want you to treat it as your own,i,it is not the money the main problem but i want you to keep it tidy all the time so that i will be glad to see it neat when i come for a check up.

SO IF YOU ARE REALY INTRESTED I WILL WANT YOU TO FILL THE RENTAPPLICATIONS FORMS BELOWRENT APPLICATION FORM

Also,Pls let me get this answer. FIRST NAME:__________________MIDDLE NAME: _________________LAST NAME: __________________PROFESSION: ________________
HOME PHONE (____) __________(CELL)PHONE (____) __________
(WORK)PHONE (____) __________
KIDS _____ (YES/NO), HOW MANY ________
PRESENT ADDRESS: _____________________CITY: _______________STATE: ______________ZIPCODE: ____________
HOW LONG DO YOU INTEND STAYING? ____________
WHEN DO YOU INTEND MOVING IN? ______________
HOW SOON CAN YOU HAVE THE DEPOSIT PAYMENT SENT TO ME _______________
HOW SOON DO YOU WANT TO RECEIVE THE KEYS AND DOCUMETS OF THE HOUSE___________________________
DO YOU HAVE A PET: _____________NAME OF PET: _____________
KIND OF PETS: _____________DO YOU SMOKE? ______________
DO YOU DRINK? ______________

Looking forward to hear from you with all this details so that i can have it in my file incase of issuing the receipt for you and contacting you.Await your urgent reply so that we can discuss on how to get the document and the key to you,Note that the keys and documents of my house is with me here in west africa.please we are giving you the house base on trust and again i will want you to stick to your words,you know that,we do not see yet and only putting everything into Gods hand,so please do notl et us down in this our property and God bless you more as you do this..

HOUSE INFORMATIONADDRESS:2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067..This 4 bedroom, 2 bath home features a spacious remodeled interior, covered parking, and a large deck in the fenced backyard. New paint and refinished hardwood flooring. This home is served by Powers Ferry Elementary, East Cobb Middle, and Wheeler High Schools.
Bedrooms: 4
Bathrooms:2
Rent per month: $700
Deposit Req'd:700
Application Fee: $0
Parking: Reserved.
Available: Now
ADDRESS :2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067
Pet policy: Ok
Smoking inside policy: no smoking
Lease terms: AS LONG AS YOU WHICH..
YOU CAN CONTACT ME ON +234-803-855-9566 Or 011-234-803-855-9566.

Thanks And God Bless You.

Pure Comedy

2009-01-30T14:24:00.007-05:00

As a Charlatan, you are often privy to personal conversations. Well today, I had the most amusing conversation with one of my good friends about a certain female he knows. He summarized their earlier conversation and it went something like this:

Him: So how have you been?
Her: Fine, but I think I have depression. I've read this book and I have all the signs.
Him: Oh, well have you been to the doctor? After all, you're a lawyer.
Her: No, but I also have this condition where lack of sunshine causes a chemical imbalance.
Him: Umm, okay, so what are you going to do?
Her: Well, I have to buy this lamp that will replace the missing sunshine.
***Let's take a break here, how can anyone MISS sunshine, but I digress! LOL
Him: Umm, okay - and how much does that cost?
Her: about $300 a piece.

**** This is when I lost it. I couldn't take anymore - PURE COMEDY! Ma'am, are you sure it's the lack of sunshine that is causing the chemical imbalance? You, lady, and the self-diagnosis are UNSAVORY!

Part two---What does this UNSAVORY foolishness actually mean? I know there had to be a better way to word this statement.

"He has been consistently recruiting 500 executives, managers and technical professionals annually."

Who Knew?

2009-01-29T09:43:00.004-05:00

If you are like the Unsavory Charlatans, you know plenty of people who work in some capacity for the Federal government. Well, imagine our suprise when we learned that for years, our friends and colleagues have been celebrating the WRONG holiday in February. For years, we have all enjoyed the "Presidents' Day Holiday" or the "Presidents' Day" sales, etc, and so on.
http://www.pocketdeal.com/deal-Macy's-President's-Day-Sale%5E7258.aspx

Yep, you've guessed it - FOR YEARS, YOU HAVE BEEN WRONG. Now the Unsavory Charlatans are left wondering - who's on first? According to the U.S. Code and the Office of Personnel Management in Washington, DC. The holiday was and still remains - George Washington's Birthday. You can now consider yourself informed. Stop indulging in those President's Day Sales and go chop down a cherry tree, for good ole' George!

http://www.opm.gov/Operating_Status_Schedules/fedhol/2009.asp

Monday, February 16* Washington’s Birthday

http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/5/6103.shtml
(a) The following are legal public holidays:
New Year’s Day, January 1.
Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr., the third Monday in January.
Washington’s Birthday, the third Monday in February.

We don't make this stuff up

2009-01-28T20:18:00.003-05:00

Saturn is missing some of its inhabitants. You can't make this stuff up! I wonder what gave away that this idea could be a PROBLEM!

Lingerie Bowl Canceled Over Nakedness

The Boss' halftime show is safe. Lingerie Bowl VI has been canceled because of a dispute between the organizers and the nudist colony that was going to host the event. The game, which was supposed to air as a pay-per-view event during halftime of the Super Bowl, was sure to siphon off dozens of fans from the game. But the nudist colony wouldn't promise that its fans wouldn't show up in the buff, so the organizers called off the game.

LOL! You gotta love the Superbowl.

The explanation for the cancellation doesn't make a whole lot of sense, and seems to indicate that the Lingerie Bowl was headed for financial disaster. The game had struggled to find a place to play, and the players had not been happy about playing at a nudist resort.Because of all that, the "league" said it had no choice but to call it quits.

"The league will not place our fans, players, staff nor partners in a less-than-comfortable environment that would ultimately jeopardize the mainstream perception and reputation of the brand that so many have worked diligently over these past five years to build," the league's Stephon McMillen said. So yes, the organizers of a football game played by women in bras and panties were worried that the integrity and wholesome family atmosphere of their game would be ruined by having naked men and women in the stands. And somehow, they hadn't figured out that might happen when they signed up to have the game played at a nudist resort.

Maybe they didn't get the memo

2009-01-28T20:12:00.006-05:00

With all that's been going on with the economy, foreclosure and unemployment. What the heck I wear on my JOB uniform, would be the least of my worries. I guess these folks didn't get the memo.

http://money.aol.com/news/articles/_a/bbdp/spirit-airlines-flight-attendants-upset/320624 bbdp/spirit-airlines-flight-attendants-upset/320624

Spirit Air Staff Upset Over New Uniforms- Flight Attendants Say They're Being Turned Into 'Walking Billboards'

MIAMI (Jan. 28) — Flight attendants for Spirit Airlines are unhappy with a new uniform design that includes aprons displaying logos for alcoholic beverages.

The Association of Flight Attendants chapter at Spirit Airlines said Tuesday that the uniforms send the wrong signal to passengers and make it harder for flight attendants to enforce safety regulations. Deborah Crowley, president of Spirit's flight attendants union chapter, said in a statement that "turning flight attendants into walking billboards is unacceptable."

The union also said it found some of Spirit's advertisements to be sexist and demeaning.
In a statement provided to AOL, Spirit Air said that the onboard marketing program is key at a time where many airlines continue to trim capacity and cut jobs. The airline says the uniform ads:
* lower operating costs* allow the airline to continue offering low fares* keep employees employed * in no way interfere with the safety of passengers* in no way interfere with the ability of flight attendants to carry out their responsibilities

GET IT RIGHT!

2009-01-28T15:08:00.010-05:00

Don't you hate it when people mix up the works in popular phrases in an attempt to make themselves sound smarter? We have e-mail evidence of our claim. For example:

"Don't make a mountain out of a MULE hill..."
"That is a MUTE point..."
"I'm enjoying the FRENCH benefits..."
"The organization is celebrating their CENTENERARY..." (Centenary)
"I have merchandise for SELL..." and "You know they say that sex SALES..."

--- OK, this sends me to the MOON. PLEASE learn when to use the word Sell v Sale.

Moving on to office tomfoolery:

Here's something totally confusing from an IT trainer in a corporation:

"...we strongly encourage you not to change this setting..." WHAT?

And one from the office manager:

"...please bring all of your outgoing mail to the 6th floor mailroom by 4:30 pm for posting and handling..." Huh? Where is she going to post it? She actually had the nerve to send that e-mail out twice this week!

We're Back!

2009-01-28T15:00:00.001-05:00

After a five month sabbatical, Tales of the Unsavory is back with more true foolishness to share. We, the Unsavory Charlatans, are tortured by the shenanigans of people we are forced to deal with on daily basis. We refuse to believe that there are so many nimrods free to pollute the air with ridiculous comments and actions without any repercussions. Therefore, we will continue to expose these people for the idiots they are in an attempt to protect the innocent from the virus known as STUPIDITY!

Our work continues!
The Unsavory Charlatans

GIMMIE MY ROOMBA!

2008-08-28T22:11:00.004-04:00

Ok, so two of my aunts chipped in and purchased me a iRobot Roomba as a housewarming gift. Ask me where it is? They are holding ‘him’ hostage and I am FURIOUS...ok maybe not furious (LOL) I actually think it’s pretty funny. They both also purchased one for themselves. So now they keep torturing me with tales of how cool ‘he’ is and stories of how he backs himself out of corners and travel around the house all day on cleaning expeditions. So today, I found out that there is a website that sells costumes for your Roomba (http://www.myroombud.com/). I’m really pissed now! I dress up my cats and I will dress my iRobot too…if I ever get him! I WANT MY DAMN ROOMBA! LOL

2008-08-24T00:00:00.006-04:00

We want to take this short commercial break to congratulate Carla Ramson, winner of the 2008-2009 Tales of the Unsavory Ms. Pimp USA contest!

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Friday, August 22, 2008

On this day, three was a crowd.

Until Sunday, 35-year-old Carla Ramson lived in an apartment in southwest Atlanta with two men she identified as her husband and live-in boyfriend, according to an Atlanta police report. Both men were arrested after they got into a fight at their apartment in the 2900 block of Third Avenue, possibly because one got jealous of the other.

The husband, Tracy Lee, 25, was arrested on charges of aggravated assault and battery, and he was released Tuesday from the Fulton County Jail on $25,000 bond.

The boyfriend, Michael Reed, 21, is facing two felony charges, including aggravated assault. He, too, got out of jail Thursday after posting $35,000 bond.

The incident happened at 11:30 a.m. Sunday.

Ramson told police that she and husband Lee were having sex in her bedroom, while Reed was sitting in the living room, the report said.

Apparently that didn't sit well with Reed. He got angry and demanded that Ramson and Lee let him in the bedroom, the report said. Reed somehow got into the bedroom and pushed Lee, the woman told police. Lee returned the favor, pushing Reed onto a table lamp, the report said. Reed then picked up a glass vase and hit Lee in the face, Lee told police. Lee retaliated by getting a knife and trying to stab Reed several times, Reed told police. When police arrived, Reed was taken to Grady Memorial Hospital for injuries, and both were eventually taken to jail.

When reached by phone Thursday afternoon, Ramson said that both men no longer lived there and she wasn't going to worry about it. But she said she couldn't talk because she had company over, and she asked a reporter to call her later.

She could not be reached later.

THE TECHNOLOGY TROLLS ARE BOTHERING US AGAIN

2008-08-22T17:03:00.003-04:00

Email from Unsavory Charlatan: Hi everyone! Pictures of __________'s football game are attached. Enjoy!

Reply from family member: Please send me hard copies of the photos you sent of ______ this morning.

I am going to write my congressman. Why would I go and get you hard copies of pictures I EMAILED YOU. That point of me e-mailing it is so you would have it! GO MAKE YOUR OWN DAMN COPIES! THAT JUST MADE ME MAD, I'VE HAD IT!

BUT IT WAS A NON PROFIT HOAX!...

2008-08-21T13:56:00.003-04:00

OK, so the Unsavory Charlatans are writing to the University of Maryland as well as our other institutions of higher learning for a FULL refund on our educations. We have learned absolutely NOTHING! While we work hard to keep our heads above water, there are bumbling IDIOTS allowed to freely roam the earth and get media attention for their ridiculous high-jinks!

Story from the AJC.com

They claim their hoax was not for profit, but Atlanta residents Matthew Whitton and Rick Dyer received $50,000 from a California Bigfoot tracker who now plans to sue to get the money back.
The two Georgia men's tale of having found a Bigfoot carcass in the North Georgia woods really started to stink when California Bigfoot enthusiasts finally examined the body and found it was just a costume.

"There will be legal action" said Catherine Ortez, who works for Searching for Bigfoot, Inc. in in Menlo Park, Calif. The organization paid for rights to the men's story and their find. "If this was a joke, it was very methodical and thought-out," she said.

The Searching site was founded by Tom Biscardi, who authenticated and promoted the alleged Georgia Sasquatch. Biscardi, who did not return calls requesting comment, has his own credibility issues, according to a police officer in a nearby jurisdiction. "He was involved in a similar hoax a few years back," said Agent Dan Ryan with the Palo Alto (Calif.) Police Department.

In an interview with WSB-TV Wednesday night, Whitton and Dyer's attorney, Steve Lister, blamed Biscardi for blowing his clients' joke out of proportion. "It started off as some YouTube videos and a Web site," said Whitton, "We're all about having fun."

Whitton, 28, a Clayton County police officer for six years, was fired Tuesday after news of the hoax spread. Dyer, 31, is a former Clayton County corrections officer. Though, according to their site, the pair are not averse to making money off their amusement. For $500, you can join them for a Bigfoot expedition. They also sell Sasquatch-related T-shirts and caps.

Repeated attempts to reach both men were unsuccessful, and Lister did not return calls seeking comment.

OFFICE SHENANIGANS

2008-08-20T15:32:00.003-04:00

We, the Unsavory Charlatans, hereby launch a global crusade against the lack of technology knowledge in the work place. We’re not saying you need to be Bill Gates, but don’t be a complete IDIOT! It’s almost 2009 for crying out loud! If you are still in the workforce there is no excuse for being technologically challenged! LEARN IT….IT’S NOT GONNA GO AWAY!

Below is a short record of REDICULOUS comments made by company executives (people who make six figure salaries) and their bone-head assistants. Enjoy, and share our pain -

EXHIBIT A: “...so I need your help with my PowerPoint presentation. I need pictures added to a few of the pages (slides)…yeah, I’d do it myself but my PC is really high-tech and it won’t allow me to add images…”

Reply to self –
**BLANK STARE** --- THE SOUNDS OF PRETTY LITTLE BIRDS CHIRPING

EXHIBIT B: “…Tom needs changes to his PowerPoint presentation. I printed the pages (she meant slides), wrote his comments down, and scanned it. I will email the scan to you…He really wants the text to ‘slide in’. ”

Reply to self –

1. The text DOES slide in…YOU CAN’T SEE THAT ON A PRINT OUT YOU F------ IDIOT!

2. Why didn’t she just make the changes herself? I can not believe she took the time to print out a presentation, write on it, SCAN it, then e-mail it! What a waste of time and paper!!!

EXHIBIT C: “The conference organizers want me to bring a copy of my presentation to load it to their lap top. How do I do that?”

Reply to self –

Are you serious? It’s called a Flash Drive.

EXHIBIT D: “I was poking around on the company website and re-read my article that you posted. You need to re-do it - at the end of the article I clicked on my email hyperlink and it opened an email window - but the email is to ME from ME. Clearly you did something wrong!!”

Reply to self–

Am I being Punked? That’s what’s supposed to happen you MORON! If you click on your email hyperlink you are going to generate an email to you from you…if I click on your email hyperlink it will generate an email to you from ME. GET OFF THE WEBSITE AND FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO SCREW UP…IDIOT!

EXHIBIT E: “My printer is not printing correctly today. You need to change the font on this document. Strange, the same document printed just fine yesterday.”

Reply to self –

Hey DOOFUS – First of all, the problem is your PRINTER. Changing the font wont help - the doc is in Arial, you can’t get anymore basic that that! CALL THE IT HELP DESK! GO AWAY AND FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO AGGRAVATE!

EXHIBIT F: “I have the letters ready for the marketing mailing. I sent EACH letter to you. There are 24 different files.”

Reply to consultant –

Why are there so many files? Why didn’t you do a mail merge?

Reply from consultant –

“Oh…I don’t know how to do a mail merge and I don’t want to share my contacts with my administrative assistant plus I didn’t want to bother her…”

Reply to self –

So you’d rather bother me? Are you on drugs? So much for her Ivy League education!

RIP Bernie 'Dollar Bill' Mac

2008-08-09T12:35:00.002-04:00

One of the Kings of Comedy, Mr. Bernie Mac, passed away this morning at the age of 50.

He will be missed by many.

It's All Fun & Games Until Someone Gets STABBED!

2008-08-09T08:02:00.002-04:00

Who says QVC isn't entertaining television? Check out this clip as one of the network hosts accidentially cuts himself with a SWORD!

And That's How The Fight Started....

2008-08-06T16:16:00.001-04:00

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.... so, I took her to a gas station.....

And that's how the fight started...
************************************************** **********************

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver haired chest. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too'.

And that's how the fight started...

************************************************** *********************
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And that's how the fight started...

Judge: Girl's name, Talula Does The Hula, won't do

2008-07-24T11:43:00.003-04:00

Thu Jul 24, 5:41 AM ET

WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A family court judge in New Zealand has had enough with parents giving their children bizarre names here, and did something about it.
Just ask Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii. He had her renamed.

Judge Rob Murfitt made the 9-year-old girl a ward of the court so that her name could be changed, he said in a ruling made public Thursday. The girl was involved in a custody battle, he said.

The new name was not made public to protect the girl's privacy."The court is profoundly concerned about the very poor judgment which this child's parents have shown in choosing this name," he wrote. "It makes a fool of the child and sets her up with a social disability and handicap, unnecessarily."

The girl had been so embarrassed at the name that she had never told her closest friends what it was. She told people to call her "K" instead, the girl's lawyer, Colleen MacLeod, told the court.
In his ruling, Murfitt cited a list of the unfortunate names. Registration officials blocked some names, including Fish and Chips, Yeah Detroit, Keenan Got Lucy and Sex Fruit, he said. But others were allowed, including Number 16 Bus Shelter "and tragically, Violence," he said.

New Zealand law does not allow names that would cause offense to a reasonable person, among other conditions, said Brian Clarke, the registrar general of Births, Deaths and Marriages.
Clarke said officials usually talked to parents who proposed unusual names to convince them about the potential for embarrassment.

Ohhhh the comedy AND irony of this story. Unsavory yet painfully HILARIOUS to me in oh so many ways!

When a Keppin' It Real Wedding Goes WRONG!

2008-07-21T13:30:00.017-04:00

Disclaimer: We do not know these people (thank GOD)

Can you get herpies from a photo?

What?! It's a logical question?

Pay To Have Fish Nibble The Skin Off Your Feet

2008-07-21T13:14:00.008-04:00

ALEXANDRIA, Virginia (AP) -- Ready for the latest in spa pampering? Prepare to dunk your tootsies in a tank of water and let tiny carp nibble away.

Fish pedicures are creating something of a splash in the D.C. area, where a northern Virginia spa has been offering them for the past four months. John Ho, who runs the Yvonne Hair and Nails salon with his wife, Yvonne Le, said 5,000 people have taken the plunge so far.

"This is a good treatment for everyone who likes to have nice feet," Ho said. He said he wanted to come up with something unique while finding a replacement for pedicures that use razors to scrape off dead skin. The razors have fallen out of favor with state regulators because of concerns about whether they're sanitary.

Ho was skeptical at first about the fish, which are called garra rufa but typically known as doctor fish. They were first used in Turkey and have become popular in some Asian countries.
But Ho doubted they would thrive in the warm water needed for a comfortable footbath. And he didn't know if customers would like the idea. "I know people were a little intimidated at first," Ho said. "But I just said, 'Let's give it a shot.' "

Customers were quickly hooked.

Tracy Roberts, 33, of Rockville, Maryland, heard about it on a local radio show. She said it was "the best pedicure I ever had" and has spread the word to friends and co-workers.
"I'd been an athlete all my life, so I've always had calluses on my feet. This was the first time somebody got rid of my calluses completely," she said.

First time customer KaNin Reese, 32, of Washington, described the tingling sensation created by the toothless fish: "It kind of feels like your foot's asleep," she said.

The fish don't do the job alone. After 15 to 30 minutes in the tank, customers get a standard pedicure, made easier by the soft skin the doctor fish leave behind.

Ho believes his is the only salon in the country to offer the treatment, which costs $35 for 15 minutes and $50 for 30 minutes. The spa has more than 1,000 fish, with about 100 in each individual pedicure tank at any given time.

Dennis Arnold, a podiatrist who four years ago established the International Pedicure Association, said he had never heard of the treatment and doubts it will become widespread.
"I think most people would be afraid of it," he said.

Customer Patsy Fisher, 42, of Crofton, Maryland, admitted she was nervous as she prepared for her first fish pedicure. But her apprehension dissolved into laughter after she put her feet in the tank and the fish swarmed to her toes. "It's a little ticklish, actually," she said.

Ho said the hot water in which the fish thrive doesn't support much plant or aquatic life, so they learned to feed on whatever food sources were available -- including dead, flaking skin. They leave live skin alone because, without teeth, they can't bite it off.

In addition to offering pedicures, Ho hopes to establish a network of Doctor Fish Massage franchises and is evaluating a full-body fish treatment that, among other things, could treat psoriasis and other skin ailments. Ho spent a year and about $40,000 getting the pedicures up and running, with a few hiccups along the way.

State regulations make no provision for regulating fish pedicures. But the county health department -- which does regulate pools -- required the salon to switch from a shallow, tiled communal pool that served as many as eight people to individual tanks in which the water is changed for each customer.

The communal pool also presented its own problem: At times the fish would flock to the feet of an individual with a surplus of dead skin, leaving others with a dearth of fish. "It would sometimes be embarrassing for them but it was also really hilarious," Ho said.

THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING I HAVE EVER HEARD! THEY ARE ALL GOING TO CATCH THE GOUT! ARE THEY SERIOUS?

A streak of bad luck!!!

2008-07-18T10:40:00.003-04:00

Okay, so I know I am so going to hell for literraly "laughing out loud" when I heard this story on the radio this morning, but it is HILARIOUS. Don't get me wrong, I am really sorry for this man's loss, but this has got to be the most ridiculous unfortunate luck I had heard about all week.

What do you do when you loose your leg--------------------twice????! At least he is taking all in stride.......... ---OMG, no pun intended!

Sir, your luck is so UNSAVORY and the charlatans hope it gets better!

NY man loses prosthetic leg while skydiving

POUGHKEEPSIE, N.Y. - An upstate New York man says he's still upbeat despite losing the same leg twice. Scott Listemann told the Poughkeepsie Journal that he laughs about losing his foot and lower leg "both the first time and the second time."

The Town of Poughkeepsie man lost his leg below the knee in a November, 2007 accident. The 47-year-old Listemann lost his prosthetic leg last month while skydiving in upstate New York.
The lower leg below the knee, with a foot clad in a running shoe, flew off after he jumped from the plane but before the parachute opened. Listemann says he's sure "it will show up eventually."

Listemann has distributed flyers throughout upstate Gardiner and hopes someone will find his prosthetic leg and call him.

http://www.examiner.com/a-1493216~NY_man_loses_prosthetic_leg_while_skydiving.html

Coyote Ugly

2008-07-14T19:55:00.002-04:00

COYOTE RUNS AMOK IN DA' BRONX!!

RIVERDALE, N.Y. (CBS) ― An adventurous young coyote roamed a residential neighborhood in the Bronx for several hours Wednesday before being cornered and captured. CBS 2 HD was there when Animal Care and Control Officers caught the wild animal outside a home on Post Road in the Riverdale section of the borough. Residents were surprised to see the coyote, estimated to be no older than 6 months.

The chase began at 10 a.m. when the coyote was spotted on the grounds of the Horace Mann School. It fled to a residential area about three blocks away where it darted from driveway to driveway, including one owned by Taeoak Cha. "It might be dangerous," Cha said. "My question is how it came here?" The lucky break for Nelson Guzman of Animal Care and Control came when the animal rested behind some trash cans. The fact the coyote is a baby made his job easier. "I think he somehow got away from his mom," Guzman said. "He's not yet ready to hunt on his own.

If it was a full-sized coyote I would not be able to get within 20 feet of him. My best guess is they come from Van Cortlandt Park and Westchester." The plan is to return the coyote to the wilderness upstate. Sightings of wily Coyotes are rare in the city but not unheard of. In March 2006 a coyote was captured in Central Park.

BOOTY POP!

2008-07-08T20:47:00.002-04:00

OK, so this is more funny than it is unsavory. It would be unsavory if I purchased this contraption...can you say, "total ECLIPSE"?

CELEB PLASTIC SURGERY GONE AWRY - MALE EDITION

2008-07-02T19:56:00.007-04:00

When it comes to cosmetic surgery we tend to pick on the ladies (see earlier post with Lil Kim and her new twin - The Bride of Chucky). Now it's time to poke fun at the dudes! Here goes:

**DISCLAIMER**

Please do not eat or drink anything before viewing, I don't want to be responsible for anyone barfing on their keyboard!

1st up - Carrot Top

Axl Rose - are those corn rows????????? Sir, SERIOUSLY!

Mickey Rourke - Ewww GROSS!

You know this guy takes top prize! The one and only WACKO JACKO!

Just Plain Daily Dumb Ass News

2008-07-02T11:18:00.004-04:00

Okay, so in just a brief sweep of the morning's TOP news stories, here is what I find. How does some of this stuff truly qualify as news. This crap is just PLAIN DUMB!

1. A Judge in Atlanta must have woke up on the wrong side of the bed, how else do you explaining fining someone $200 bucks for a ringing cell phone. Good thing it wasn't T.I.!

http://www.switched.com/2008/07/01/judge-slaps-200-fines-on-men-whose-cell-phones-rang-in-court/?icid=100214839x1205067100x1200219610

Your Honor, you sir are UNSAVORY!!!

2) Prince Charles' Car Runs on Wine - http://news.aol.com/story/_a/prince-charles-car-runs-on-wine/20080701161009990002

Now I don't know about you, but that is just plain ALCOHOL ABUSE! I would much rather take mass transit or pay $4 a gallon, than waste a perfectly good bottle of Cabernet Sauvingon.

3) Rocker Pete Wentz admits he's kissed guys! -
""A long time ago. Probably when I was 22?" said the 29-year-old Wentz, who also said he has a man-crush on fellow musician John Mayer."

Read the full story - http://news.aol.com/entertainment/music/music-news-story/ar/_a/pete-wentz-admits-hes-kissed-guys/20080701103509990002?icid=100214839x1205034511x1200225339

BIG ASS SOOO WHAT! He's dating Ashley Simpson and is about to be a Dad, as long as he isn't kissing them now!!!!! Who Cares!!

So now I have a better understanding of where journalist spend their time in the midnight hours. Wow, I guess my Mass Comm degree is really going to waste with this whole blogging thing.

2008 BET Awards

2008-07-01T23:07:00.004-04:00

The Cirque du Weird (better known as) Lil Kim made a foolish appearance at the 2008 BET Awards.

Hey, I'm all about doing what makes you feel good about yourself and if cosmetic surgery is the way for you then by all means, carry on...but I don't think this was the look Kim was going for -

Lil Kim meets Bride of Chucky!

Listen to THIS Idiot

2008-07-01T22:51:00.002-04:00

OK, so some turd leaves these psychotic voicemail messages for this lady. Good thing she's a nice lady and decided to just humiliate this jack ass by posting the messages for the world to hear. Had it been me, he would have found a thumb in his mailbox the next morning!

Douchebag Phone Message - Watch more free videos

Boycott the Olympics???

2008-07-01T16:36:00.008-04:00

There REALLY needs to be a certain point where people can just do stuff for the sheer enjoyment of doing it. At some point, politics and political beliefs need to be eliminated from one's point of view of what is good, right and enjoyable to all human kind. Congressmen Wolf (R-VA) and Smith (R-NJ) (among others) want President Bush to BOYCOTT THE BEIJING OLYMPICS!! *****BLANK STARE******

Are you serious?????

Read an article here - http://www.expressindia.com/latest-news/US-lawmakers-ask-Bush-to-boycott-Olympics/329891/

Now, maybe my historical memory isn't as sharp as it used to be, but hasnt' the world known about the problems and issues with Chinese's human rights violations, etc for decades now! Wasn't any of this stuff brought up when Beijing was considered as the location? Seriously! How are you going to wait until approximately one month before the Games are supposed to start? After we Americans have seen a glimpse of what records could possibly be broken in Track & Field!! After athletes from all around the country have been sweating, working, slaving, starving, etc. to make it to this point -SOMETHING THAT ONLY HAPPENS ONCE EVERY FOUR YEARS! Now, you want to boycott!!!! Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I don't somewhat understand the concept, but really - could your timing suck any worse?!!!! You didn't think about this when folks kept blocking and taking the TORCH!!!

I wonder if McCain and Obama will weigh in on this?

An athlete that was a part of the 1980 team, that boycotted the Moscow Olympics agrees with my sentiments of this boycotting foolishness at this point! Read more -http://afp.google.com/article/ALeqM5iu-GSwEv1ADRH5ZtY2vqDFzUy7rg

Congressmen Wolf and Smith, for potentially setting off something that could dash the hopes, dreams and aspirations of hundreds of Americans - YOU SIRS, ARE UNSAVORY!!!!!

Unsavory Celebrity - DONALD TRUMP

2008-07-01T13:22:00.006-04:00

Donald Trump clearly doesn't have enough to do with his time.... He needs to worry less about Hollywood actors and more about something that makes men throughout the world smile.

What Trump shouldn't worry about: Anne Hathaway and her former beau!
http://news.aol.com/entertainment/movies/movie-news-story/ar/_a/trump-says-hathaway-is-disloyal/20080701072909990001

What Trump SHOULD worry about!!! -This 2008 Miss Universe Pageant - http://www.missuniverse.com/.

This is the time of year that women (and men) from around the world look forward to seeing some of the most beautiful women alive. Of course, I am pulling for Miss USA 2008 - Crystal Steward of Texas.

With beauty like this ready to take the stage, who really cares about Princess Amelia and her boyfriend!!! News, to the Donald, first it was Rosie, now it is Anne - believe it or not, you are still relevant in some circles of life. For choosing to once again waste your time and pick on helpless, defenseless women - You sir, are UNSAVORY!!!!

No Sex in the Champagne Room

2008-07-01T12:43:00.003-04:00

See, here's the deal. If you say it out of your mouth or do it in public, it becomes FAIR GAME for Tales of the Unsavory!!!!! Where in the hell is Chris Rock when you need him!

Sometimes, people do some of the dumbest things. Okay, Friday night one of the Unsavory Charlatans went on a date. First one in a very long time, she figured since this was someone she had known since her college days, an upstanding citizen, public education official with respectable credentials - this should be a nice evening right!!! Well it was.............. until about 2 hours into the evening. I guess I should also mention that the young fellow was an hour and a half late for said date! Anyway, moving along, there they were coasting along in said gentleman's sea craft, cruising down the Potomas River with some chilled champagne and delectable crab legs. She decided to stand and take a look at their view from the vessels and he decides to stand up behind her, a nice little snuggle in the brisk air. All of a sudden! she hears a noise that sounds suspiciously like his belt buckle being undone. Turns around only to see his PANTS DROP TO HIS FEET! I mean really, sir!!!!! After telling him off with a few choice four-letter words, she left him with this final statement before she demanded to be taken back to her car! There will be no sex in the champagne room tonight!!!

Sir, for being a pure nasty jack ass on the first date, on National HIV awareness day and on the middle of a boat in the dirty, filth ridden Potomac - YOU ARE UNSAVORY!!!!

When "Keeping It Real" Goes Wrong!

2008-06-28T22:59:00.004-04:00

Rapper DMX was arrested (AGAIN) in an undercover narcotics sting.

Details:

He approached an undercover Miami-Dade Police narcotics detective and requested to purchase “30 Powder & 15 Weed” — street slang for cocaine and marijuana. X handed over $45 — and was arrested.

When will people learn that being a crack-head is not attractive? Don't most people enjoy having dignity, self respect, ...teeth? I'm just making an observation :o)

DMX - You sir, are UNSAVORY!

PedEgg Accused Of Gross Injustice

2008-06-28T22:45:00.003-04:00

Model couple sues over appearance in ubiquitous, revolting TV spot
From The Smoking Gun

JUNE 25--You're not the only one revolted by that ubiquitous commercial for the PedEgg, the low-rent foot care device hawked nonstop on cable TV. Two Florida foot models featured in the spot allege that they were duped into appearing in the commercials and claim that the PedEgg's manufacturer even applied "horror make-up" to one of their feet prior to shooting "before and after" footage. Married models Kelly Parks-Corso and Jonathan Corso allege that they were each paid a few hundred dollars for filming last year, but that they never negotiated a separate agreement covering the actual airing of the PedEgg commercials.

In a Florida Circuit Court lawsuit, a copy of which you'll find below, the Corsos allege that they were "shocked" to discover the "cheap, low quality" PedEgg commercial was being broadcast worldwide without their permission. The couple alleges that the commercial portrays them in a "negative light" and was supposed to be an "Internet-only infomercial." Instead, the ad "has now run all over the world," the complaint notes, and even can be seen playing on a loop in retail outlets like Bed Bath & Beyond, said Jonathan David, the Corsos's lawyer.

Prior to the July 2007 filming, a makeup artist added "artificial bumps and discoloration" to Kelly's feet in order to "make a 'before' shot for comparison in a 'before-and-after' scheme," the June 23 complaint charges. David told TSG that the makeup artist said that he exclusively did "horror makeup," which might be of concern to truth-in-advertising sticklers. Kelly Parks-Corso, who has long curly red hair, is seen at the commercial's outset putting on panty hose, and then later in the spot wearing a green skirt. Her husband is seen sitting on a couch. The Corsos each have appeared in a wide range of commercials for firms like Wal-Mart, Royal Caribbean, and Giorgio Armani, said David. Additionally, in 2003 they were contestants on CBS's "The Amazing Race," finishing second in the around-the-world reality show.

The Corsos's lawsuit, which does not specify monetary damages, accuses the PedEgg's manufacturer and the commercial's producers of unauthorized use of their names and likenesses, negligence, and fraud.

The lawsuit and commercial can be viewed her - http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/0625083pedegg1.html?link=rssfeed
I've actually heard good things about the product and the commercial doesn't look as unsavory as they claim!

Michigan Man Accused Of Stabbing Mom With Fork and Attacking Woman With Frozen Chicken

2008-06-28T22:37:00.002-04:00

(AP) A man was accused of stabbing his mother with a fork and assaulting a second woman with 10 pounds of frozen chicken. Frederick Duane McKaney, 40, of Ypsilanti, was arraigned Wednesday in 12th District Court in Jackson.

He faces two felony assault charges as well as one count of assault and battery and one count of resisting an officer. Prosecutors said McKaney stabbed his mother in the back of the neck with a fork Monday night. About an hour later, he hit a woman in the head with a plastic bag of frozen chicken. They had exchanged rude words while he rode his bicycle.

She needed five surgical staples to close her wound. McKaney has no attorney on record with the court. A pre-exam conference is scheduled for July 2.

Transgender Toilets in Bangkok High School

2008-06-28T22:29:00.002-04:00

In Bangkok, Thailand there are separate bathrooms for teen boys who prefer to dress as girls at one rural high school. No more tough decisions about which toilet to take to or having to go to the teachers’ lounge.

The Kampang School in northeastern Thailand conducted a survey last term that showed more than 200 of the school’s 2,600 students considered themselves transgender, said school director Sitisak Sumontha. So, when classes resumed in May, the school unveiled a unisex restroom designated by a human figure split in half - part man in blue and part woman in red. Below it are the words “Transvestite Toilet.”

Three transgender students praised the new restroom as they plucked their eyebrows and applied face powder in front of the mirror outside the stalls. Most rural Thais are conservative in many ways, but the trailblazing toilet initiative at the school in northeastern Sisaket province reflects another aspect of Thai society: its tolerance of the country’s very visible transgender community. The term describes a wide range of identities including cross-dressers, transvestites, transsexuals and those born with the physical characteristics of both sexes.

Kampang is not Thailand’s first educational institution to set up unisex washrooms, though Sitisak said he believed it was a first for a secondary school. A 1,500-student technical college in the northern province of Chiang Mai set up a “Pink Lotus Bathroom” for its 15 transvestite students in 2003. Deputy Education Minister Boonlue Prasertsopar recently said the ministry plans to count the number of transgender university students.

He said he was not promoting transgender interests, “but if there are a lot of them in a university and it’s a problem, we may have to consider building toilets and dormitories for them.” Transgender’s are regularly seen on TV soap operas and throughout Bangkok, working at department store cosmetics counters, popular restaurants, in office jobs and in the capital’s red-light districts. Thailand also has transgender beauty pageants. I think a lot of those saying they consider themselves transgender are just doing it to be supportive.

Man Torches Car Because of Gas Hikes

2008-06-28T22:07:00.003-04:00

(from chron.com)

BERLIN — A German man doused his BMW with gasoline and torched it on Friday in protest of skyrocketing fuel costs, police said.

The unemployed 30-year-old drove the 1995 BMW 3-series sedan onto the lawn outside Frankfurt's convention center, police spokesman Karlheinz Wagner said.

He then jumped out, emptied a canister of gas over the vehicle and set fire to it, Wagner said. By the time the fire department got to the scene, the car was entirely burned out.

The man, whose name was being withheld because he has not been charged with a crime, told police that gas prices were so high he could no longer afford to drive the vehicle.

Gasoline prices have risen steadily in Germany; a liter of regular gasoline now costs the equivalent of about $9.40 per gallon.

Wow...$9.40 per gallon for REGULAR? That is truly UNSAVORY!

This is TOO Easy!

2008-06-28T00:27:00.004-04:00

I found this on a fellow blogger's page and I went into hysterics!

Tasty Japanese Snack: Choco Puff Colon! (it says collon but you get the idea). Enjoy!

You Nasty Buzzard!

2008-06-28T00:08:00.000-04:00

SINGAPORE (Reuters) - A Singapore man with a penchant for sniffing women's armpits was sentenced to 14 years in jail and 18 strokes of the cane for molesting his victims, a local newspaper reported Friday.

The 36-year-old, who the Straits Times said was mentally unstable, had previous convictions for drug and sex-related offences.

He molested 23 women over the course of 15 months, smelling their armpits and touching them in lifts, staircase landings and their homes, the paper said. He was caught after a housewife reported him to the police.

The court meted out the jail term, normally reserved for hardcore criminals, saying the man was likely to commit crimes again, the paper reported.

Caning on the buttocks is an additional punishment for male criminals in Singapore for offences ranging from vandalism to illegal possession of drugs and rape.

(Reporting by Melanie Lee, editing by Miral Fahmy)

How to make a telemarketer quit their job!

2008-06-27T23:56:00.003-04:00

This is HILARIOUS! The guy that recorded this call needs an award!

$360 billion=FAIL

2008-06-27T23:42:00.005-04:00

This is absurd! What the hell are these people thinking?

An unsavory Texas dumb ass was arrested for allegedly trying to cash a check for $360 billion.
Charles Ray Fuller had said he wanted to start a record business, authorities in the state said.
The 21-year-old’s attempt to cash the money in a bank in Fort Worth failed when staff spotted the 10 zeros on the personal check. Mr Fuller was arrested on a charge of forgery and was released on $3,750 bail.

The man said he had been given the check by his girlfriend’s mother. The bank said it had contacted the account owner and had been told she had not given Mr Fuller permission to either take or cash the check.

Fort Worth police said Mr Fuller also faced charges of unlawfully carrying a weapon and possessing cannabis. Officers said a small amount of cannabis and a .25-calibre pistol were found in his pocket.

In October last year a man in the city of Pittsburgh was arrested after he handed over a counterfeit $1m bill to a cashier at a supermarket and asked for change.

Three years earlier a woman was arrested after trying to use a fake $1m bill at a supermarket in Georgia.

trying to use a $1m bill in Kroger=FAIL!

Stop being so damn cheap!

2008-06-27T10:08:00.002-04:00

Okay, so they say the rich get richer by holding on to their money and spending wisely! I know gas is high and times are hard but really, have the rich had to result to enslaving people. Varsha Sabhanni, you are UNSAVORY!!!

N.Y. millionaire gets 11 years in prison for enslaving workers.

CENTRAL ISLIP, New York (AP) -- A millionaire who inflicted years of abuse on two Indonesian housekeepers held as virtual slaves in her Long Island mansion was sentenced Thursday to 11 years in prison.

Varsha Sabhnani, 46, was convicted with her husband in December on a 12-count federal indictment that included forced labor, conspiracy, involuntary servitude and harboring aliens.
The trial provided a glimpse into a growing U.S. problem of domestic workers exploited in slave-like conditions.

The victims testified that they were beaten with brooms and umbrellas, slashed with knives, and forced to climb stairs and take freezing showers as punishment. One victim was forced to eat dozens of chili peppers and then was forced to eat her own vomit when she couldn't keep the peppers down, prosecutors said.

U.S. District Judge Arthur Spatt called the testimony "eye-opening, to say the least -- that things like that go on in our country."

"In her arrogance, she treated Samirah and Enung as less than people," Assistant U.S. Attorney Demetri Jones said. "Justice for the victims, that's what the government is asking for."
Federal sentencing guidelines had recommended a range of 12 to 15 years in prison for Sabhnani, who was identified as the one who inflicted the abuse. In addition to prison, she will serve three years of probation and was fined $25,000.

"I just want to say that I love my children very much," the defendant told the court as two of her grown children looked on. "I was brought to this Earth to help people who are in need."
Mahender Sabhnani, 51, who is free on bail while awaiting his own Friday sentencing, wept as he watched his wife's punishment pronounced.

He was charged with the same crimes because he allowed the conduct to take place and benefited from the work the women performed in his home, prosecutors said. He is expected to receive a much shorter prison term.

Prosecutors contended that the accusations amounted to a "modern-day slavery" case. They said the maids were subjected to "punishment that escalated into a cruel form of torture," which ended in May 2007, when one of the women fled early on Mother's Day. She wandered into a Dunkin' Donuts wearing nothing but rags, and employees called police.

"This did not happen in the 1800s," Assistant U.S. Attorney Mark Lesko said during the trial. "This happened in the 21st century. This happened in Muttontown, New York."

The women, whose relatives in Indonesia were paid about $100 a month -- the women themselves received no cash -- said they were tortured and beaten for misdeeds that included sleeping late or stealing food from trash bins because they were poorly fed. Both women also said they were forced to sleep on mats in the kitchen.

Spatt postponed a decision on the amount of back wages owed to the women. Prosecutors suggested that the women were due more than $1.1 million, but defense attorneys said the figure should be much lower.

The couple also face fines and could be forced to forfeit their home, which is valued at almost $2 million. Mahender Sabhnani ran an international perfume business out of a home office.
One of the women arrived in the Sabhnanis' Muttontown home in 2002, the second in 2005. Their passports and other travel documents were immediately confiscated by the Sabhnanis, the women testified.

The defense, which intends to appeal, contended the two women concocted the story as a way of escaping the house for more lucrative opportunities. They also argued that the housekeepers practiced witchcraft and may have abused themselves as part of a self-mutilation ritual.
Defense attorney Jeffrey Hoffman said that 175 letters were submitted to the court detailing Sabhnani's charitable acts around the world. He called her "a woman who spent a lifetime doing good deeds."

Hoffman said that around 2004 or 2005, Sabhnani's weight plummeted from 325 pounds to 135. "She did it by starving herself," and that resulted in a chemical imbalance and significant malnourishment. "She had become a very different person."

"I think it's very harsh," Hoffman said after the sentencing. "She has suffered dramatically."

Dumb as a box of rocks!!!

2008-06-27T10:02:00.002-04:00

I found this on another blog! I can't give total credit, because I don't know who it is- but hey, we believe in the "no plagarizing rule". So here's the credit!!!

Okay, so I don't know if this was someone's idea of a really bad joke, if someone really needs to go back and have a history lesson of the past twenty-five years or if someone is just plain racist, but WHOEVER allowed this to be posted on CNN's web site is a TOTAL JACKASS and dumb as a box of rocks!

http://imajin.wordpress.com/2008/06/26/somebody-at-cnn-is-in-big-trouble/

Of course, the article has been corrected now, but WHERE IS THE PUBLIC APOLOGY. CNN, you are truly UNSAVORY!

Shaq Gets Fired On His Day Off!

2008-06-25T09:39:00.002-04:00

PHOENIX (AP)—Shaquille O’Neal will lose his special deputy’s badge in Maricopa County because of language he used in a rap video that mocks former teammate Kobe Bryant.

Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio said the Phoenix Suns center’s use of a racially derogatory word and other foul language left him no choice. Arpaio made Shaq a special deputy in 2006 and promoted him to colonel of his largely ceremonial posse later that year.

“I want his two badges back,” Arpaio told The Associated Press on Tuesday. “Because if any one of my deputies did something like this, they’re fired. I don’t condone this type of racial conduct.”
Shaq was seen in a video posted on the celebrity news and gossip Web site TMZ.com rapping that “Kobe couldn’t do without me.” O’Neal skewers the Lakers’ star, with whom he won three straight NBA titles from 2000-2002 while with Los Angeles, for not being able to win a championship without him.

“I was freestyling. That’s all. It was all done in fun. Nothing serious whatsoever,” O’Neal told ESPN.com Monday. A call to the Suns on Tuesday seeking comment from O’Neal was referred to his public relations firm, which didn’t immediately respond.

Arpaio, who describes himself as “America’s Toughest Sheriff” and is best known for feeding jail inmates green bologna, clothing them in pink underwear, and making them work on chain gangs, said he didn’t expect his actions would teach Shaq a lesson. But he hoped he learns that as a role model who wants to someday be a full-time sheriff, he needs to know his words matter.

“Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I don’t think that either conduct should be out there publicly, even if media wasn’t there,” Arpaio said.

O’Neal previously served as a reserve officer with the Miami Beach Police Department while playing for the Miami Heat. He also volunteered with the Tempe Police Department after being traded to the Suns in February.

Woman Dead for 42 Years Before Someone Noticed

2008-06-24T10:55:00.001-04:00

I know it is so cruel to laugh at this story, but really...........how does something like this happen! UNREAL AND UNSAVORY!!!

Woman Dead for 42 Years Before Someone Noticed
Jun 23rd 2008
By Tom Radler

We're not sure what was on TV in 1966 in the former Yugoslavia, but it was the last thing seen by a woman whose remains have only recently been found.

Hedviga Golik, who was born in 1924, was discovered by police in the Croatian capital of Zagreb, long-dead and sitting in her armchair in front of her black-and-white television.

The deceased had been reported missing 42 years ago, and neighbors say they thought she had moved away to live with relatives. Oddly though, the police only recently broke in to try to determine who owned the apartment and they still have not figured out how the woman could have been reported missing so long ago without anyone checking the residence.

"When officers went there, they said it was like stepping into a place frozen in time," a police spokesman said. "The cup she had been drinking tea from was still on a table next to the chair she had been sitting in ... Nothing had been disturbed for decades, even though there were more than a few cobwebs in there."

A neighbor, fittingly, remembered Golik as "a quiet woman who kept herself to herself."

Vt. inmates take state to court over unsavory Nutraloaf

2008-06-24T00:01:00.000-04:00

This news is a bit dated but I couldn't resist! Personally, I'd rather eat pet food! There is just something so gross about the word'loaf' Enjoy :o)

MONTPELIER March 23, 2008 (Boston Globe) - Savory it isn't: It's made of whole wheat bread, nondairy cheese, raw carrots, spinach, seedless raisins, beans, vegetable oil, tomato paste, powdered milk, and dehydrated potato flakes.

To prison officials, it's a complete meal. To inmates, it's a food so awful, they'd rather go hungry than eat it.

In the latest legal battle over the prison cafeteria standard known as Nutraloaf, the Vermont Supreme Court is being asked to decide whether it's punishment or a method of behavior modification.

On Monday, the court will hear arguments in a class-action suit brought by inmates who say it's punishment and that anyone subjected to it should get a formal disciplinary process first.

"It's commonplace in other states as a way of providing nutrition in a mechanism that dissuades inmates from throwing feces, urine, trays, and silverware," said Corrections Commissioner Rob Hofmann.

"It tends to have the desired outcome," Hofmann said. "Once the offender relents, we stop with the Nutraloaf. That's our goal, to protect our staff and not have them subjected to behavior that the average Vermonter would find incomprehensible."

Seth Lipschutz, an attorney with Vermont's Prisoner's Rights office, says the state has a legitimate interest in changing the behavior of inmates who misbehave.

But he says a diet of Nutraloaf is punishment, plain and simple. To call it anything else is "playing with words to get what they want. It's wrong and it's sad," he said.

"If it's punishment, you've got to follow the rules," Lipschutz said. "Even in prison you get a little bit of due process."

Nutraloaf and its equivalents have been used for decades in prisons across the country. In 1978, the US Supreme Court ruled that a substance used in Arkansas known as " 'grue' might be tolerable for a few days and intolerably cruel for weeks or months."

Since then, there have been numerous legal cases involving Nutraloaf or its equivalents. The Michigan Department of Corrections was involved in one of those cases, in which a federal judge ruled in 1988 that the use of Nutraloaf is punishment.

Now, Michigan inmates are only given Nutraloaf after going through the disciplinary process that lands them in segregation, said Department Spokesman Russ Marlan.

Occasionally, The National Prison Project of the American Civil Liberties Union gets complaints about Nutraloaf from inmates, but it hasn't been involved in the group's litigation in years.

"Our position is that it shouldn't be used unless a violation has to do with food. It shouldn't be used as punishment," said Jody Kent, the Prison Project's public policy coordinator.

Vermont Assistant Attorney General Kurt Kuehl, who will argue the case for the Department of Corrections, said the other legal cases involving food loaf centered on whether the food was so bad it constituted cruel and unusual punishment. The courts have ruled it isn't, he said.

But the Vermont case is different because the use of Nutraloaf isn't punishment, according to the state. Kuehl says it is as if a correctional officer were to find an inmate with a knife. He wouldn't have to hold a hearing to take the knife away.

"It's taking an administrative action to protect the facility," said Kuehl.

Afterward, the inmate can be subject to a separate disciplinary hearing for the conduct that led to being fed Nutraloaf.

Idiot Imus Strikes Again...

2008-06-23T23:53:00.000-04:00

A little over a year after being fired for making what were perceived as racist and sexist comments about the Rutgers women's basketball team, Don Imus is courting controversy again over a potentially racist remark made about an athlete.

When sports host Warner Wolf explained that Adam "Pacman" Jones — who was suspended in 2007 following a Last Vegas nightclub shooting incident — had been arrested six times, Imus asked, "What color is he?"

A slightly confused Wolf responded, "He's African American."

Imus then said, "Well, there you go. Now we know."

Full transcript, via AOL sports, below:

Wolf: "Defensive back Adam 'Pacman' Jones, recently signed by the Cowboys. Here's a guy suspended all of 2007 following a shooting in a Vegas night club."

Imus: "Well, stuff happens. You're in a night club, for God's sake. What do you think's gonna happen in a night club? People are drinking and doing drugs, there are women there, and people have guns. So, there, go ahead."

Wolf: "He's also been arrested six times since being drafted by Tennessee in 2005."

Imus: "What color is he?"

Wolf: "He's African-American."

Imus: "Well, there you go. Now we know."

My suggestion: Someone please take that 10 gallon hat and hold in front of his mouth...to catch all the BULLSHIT that comes out! Dude, seriously...you're an idiot and you're OLD!

Unsavory Office Conversations

2008-06-23T20:06:00.000-04:00

This is a REAL conversation that was overheard in an office today:

Setting the scene - Lady sharing a story about her adult son (almost 30 years old) who still lives with his parents:

“I gave my son some money and he told me he was going to cut the grass and then he disappeared. Then he yelled at me and told me he would fu&*ing do it tomorrow and to fu&*ing leave him alone! I asked him to do it because his father was going to go out there and do it and I think he has diabetes!"

I'm not certain I would have shared that...Very unsavory and VERY embarrassing.

RWI - Rolling While Intoxicated

2008-06-23T19:50:00.002-04:00

BRISBANE, Australia -- A man found asleep in a motorized wheelchair on a highway in northern Australia was charged with drunk driving, police said Monday.

Officers in a patrol car noticed the man slumped in the stationary chair about 10 a.m. Friday on an exit lane near the tourist city of Cairns, regional traffic Inspector Bob Waters said. Cars were swerving to get around him, Waters said.

The officers breath-tested the 64-year-old man, who registered a blood alcohol reading of 0.301 - more than six times the legal driving limit. He was charged with operating a vehicle while drunk and ordered to report to court on July 7, where he faces a stiff fine if convicted.

"The vehicles that we normally hear about with drink driving are the family car, the truck, the motorbike," Waters said. "But there are also other classes of vehicles that are subject to drink-driving laws," including horses, bicycles, and motorized wheelchairs.

The man, whose name was not released, told police he was making a nine-mile trip from his home to a friend's place, Waters said.

"He placed himself in a very dangerous situation," he said.

http://www.miamiherald.com/577/story/579858.html

A Tribute to Enemas

2008-06-23T19:41:00.002-04:00

MOSCOW, Russia (AP) --

A monument to the enema, a procedure many people would rather not think about, has been unveiled at a spa in the southern Russian city of Zheleznovodsk. The bronze syringe bulb, which weighs 800 pounds and is held by three angels, was unveiled at the Mashuk-Akva Term spa, the spa's director said Thursday.

"There is no kitsch or obscenity, it is a successful work of art," Alexander Kharchenko told The Associated Press. "An enema is almost a symbol of our region."

The Caucasus Mountains region is known for dozens of spas where enemas with water from mineral springs are routinely administered to treat digestive and other complaints.

Kharchenko, 50, said the monument cost $42,000 and was installed in a square in front of his spa on Wednesday. A banner declaring: "Let's beat constipation and sloppiness with enemas" — an allusion to a line from "The Twelve Chairs," a famous Soviet film comedy — was posted on one of the spa's walls.

Sculptor Svetlana Avakina said she designed the 5-foot-high monument with "irony and humor" and modeled the angels on those in works by Italian Renaissance painter Alessandro Botticelli.

"This device is eternal, it will never change," she told the AP. "We could promote this brand, turn it into a franchise with souvenirs and awards for medical doctors."

Dozens of monuments dedicated to characters from tall tales and popular jokes have been erected in post-Soviet Russia.

Ice T / Soulja Boy Beef

2008-06-23T19:26:00.000-04:00

Hip Hop veteran Ice T puts the little Soulja Boy in his place (warning - contains unsavory language!)