How do you spell J-A-C-K-A-S-$!? Just ask your local Barista.....I guess he learned nothing from Plaxico Burress huh? ROTFLMAO!
Starbucks Barista Pops a Cap in His Leg
WASHINGTON -- A barista at the Starbucks in the 1600 block of U Street NW accidentally shot himself in the leg Tuesday afternoon. The employee was hospitalized with non-life-threatening injuries. He's facing an unlawful possession of a firearm charge.
The barista's motive for carrying the weapon to work is unknown.
Police are investigating.
This comes as Congress considers a voting rights bill with an amendment that would strip the District of most local gun-control laws. Whether passage of such a law would increase self-inflicted barista wounds or decriminalize the shooting of oneself in the leg remains to be seen.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
I don't want nuggets, I want a refund!
The comedy of this story is out of this world. Please listen to the call. "She say she are the manager!" We can't make this stuff up!
Woman Calls 911 3 Times Over McNuggets
http://news.aol.com/article/911-mcnuggets-call/367995
FORT PIERCE, Fla. (March 3) - Authorities say a Florida woman called 911 three times after McDonald's employees told her they were out of McNuggets. A police report said 27-year-old Fort Pierce resident Latreasa L. Goodman told authorities she paid for a 10-piece last week but was later informed the restaurant had run out.
She says she was refused a refund and told all sales were final. A cashier told police she offered Goodman a larger portion of different food for the same price, but Goodman became irate. Police say Goodman was cited on a misuse of 911 charge. A current phone listing for Goodman couldn't be found.
A McDonald's spokesman says Goodman should have been given a refund, and she's being sent a gift card for a free meal.
Courtesy of TMZ.com- Listen to the calls - http://www.tmz.com/2009/03/03/mcnuggett-911-calls-the-unhappy-meal-drama
Woman Calls 911 3 Times Over McNuggets
http://news.aol.com/article/911-mcnuggets-call/367995
FORT PIERCE, Fla. (March 3) - Authorities say a Florida woman called 911 three times after McDonald's employees told her they were out of McNuggets. A police report said 27-year-old Fort Pierce resident Latreasa L. Goodman told authorities she paid for a 10-piece last week but was later informed the restaurant had run out.
She says she was refused a refund and told all sales were final. A cashier told police she offered Goodman a larger portion of different food for the same price, but Goodman became irate. Police say Goodman was cited on a misuse of 911 charge. A current phone listing for Goodman couldn't be found.
A McDonald's spokesman says Goodman should have been given a refund, and she's being sent a gift card for a free meal.
Courtesy of TMZ.com- Listen to the calls - http://www.tmz.com/2009/03/03/mcnuggett-911-calls-the-unhappy-meal-drama
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Parents just don't understand ???
Now my parents used to say on various occasions that they wanted to smack the crap out of me, lock me in my room or some other over exaggerated notion because I'd done something to piss them off. NEVER, did they appear to want to REALLY resort to violence. Apparently, this father in "B-MORE careful" must have had enough!!!! Sir - you are very UNSAVORY!!!!
___________
http://wjz.com/local/man.stabbing.church.2.942499.html
BALTIMORE (AP) - Police said a 58-year-old man stabbed his teenage son after he refused to take off his hat at church earlier in the day. The father and his 19-year-old son got into an argument on Sunday afternoon. That's when police said the father went to a car, got a knife and stabbed his son in the left buttock and fled. (I bet his azz will take that hat off next time, I know - sorry! LOL)
The son was taken to University of Maryland Medical Center for treatment. The father's name was withheld pending his arrest.
___________
http://wjz.com/local/man.stabbing.church.2.942499.html
BALTIMORE (AP) - Police said a 58-year-old man stabbed his teenage son after he refused to take off his hat at church earlier in the day. The father and his 19-year-old son got into an argument on Sunday afternoon. That's when police said the father went to a car, got a knife and stabbed his son in the left buttock and fled. (I bet his azz will take that hat off next time, I know - sorry! LOL)
The son was taken to University of Maryland Medical Center for treatment. The father's name was withheld pending his arrest.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
THE BEST EMAIL EVER
I received this email from someone trying to rent a house. This is the BEST email I have every received in my life!!! I SWEAR it is real! I had tears, real tears of laughter falling from my eyes and the sad thing about it there are people falling for this crap!
Hello Dear,
Thanks for the email and it is my gladness hearing from you.i am the owner of the house you are making enquiry of.Actually I resided in the house with my family,such as my wife and my only daugther before and presently we had packed due to my transfer from my working place and now situated in the (West Africa Nigeria) and presently my house is still available for rent ..including the utilities like hydro,washerand security,it is furnised but if u which to move in with your furnishes no problem.. i went for a Crusade in the West Africa .
Pls i want you to note that,i am a kind and honest man and also i spent alot on my property that i want to give you for rent,i will want you to take absolute maintenance of my house and want you to treat it as your own,i,it is not the money the main problem but i want you to keep it tidy all the time so that i will be glad to see it neat when i come for a check up.
SO IF YOU ARE REALY INTRESTED I WILL WANT YOU TO FILL THE RENTAPPLICATIONS FORMS BELOWRENT APPLICATION FORM
Also,Pls let me get this answer. FIRST NAME:__________________MIDDLE NAME: _________________LAST NAME: __________________PROFESSION: ________________
HOME PHONE (____) __________(CELL)PHONE (____) __________
(WORK)PHONE (____) __________
KIDS _____ (YES/NO), HOW MANY ________
PRESENT ADDRESS: _____________________CITY: _______________STATE: ______________ZIPCODE: ____________
HOW LONG DO YOU INTEND STAYING? ____________
WHEN DO YOU INTEND MOVING IN? ______________
HOW SOON CAN YOU HAVE THE DEPOSIT PAYMENT SENT TO ME _______________
HOW SOON DO YOU WANT TO RECEIVE THE KEYS AND DOCUMETS OF THE HOUSE___________________________
DO YOU HAVE A PET: _____________NAME OF PET: _____________
KIND OF PETS: _____________DO YOU SMOKE? ______________
DO YOU DRINK? ______________
Looking forward to hear from you with all this details so that i can have it in my file incase of issuing the receipt for you and contacting you.Await your urgent reply so that we can discuss on how to get the document and the key to you,Note that the keys and documents of my house is with me here in west africa.please we are giving you the house base on trust and again i will want you to stick to your words,you know that,we do not see yet and only putting everything into Gods hand,so please do notl et us down in this our property and God bless you more as you do this..
HOUSE INFORMATIONADDRESS:2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067..This 4 bedroom, 2 bath home features a spacious remodeled interior, covered parking, and a large deck in the fenced backyard. New paint and refinished hardwood flooring. This home is served by Powers Ferry Elementary, East Cobb Middle, and Wheeler High Schools.
Bedrooms: 4
Bathrooms:2
Rent per month: $700
Deposit Req'd:700
Application Fee: $0
Parking: Reserved.
Available: Now
ADDRESS :2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067
Pet policy: Ok
Smoking inside policy: no smoking
Lease terms: AS LONG AS YOU WHICH..
YOU CAN CONTACT ME ON +234-803-855-9566 Or 011-234-803-855-9566.
Thanks And God Bless You.
Hello Dear,
Thanks for the email and it is my gladness hearing from you.i am the owner of the house you are making enquiry of.Actually I resided in the house with my family,such as my wife and my only daugther before and presently we had packed due to my transfer from my working place and now situated in the (West Africa Nigeria) and presently my house is still available for rent ..including the utilities like hydro,washerand security,it is furnised but if u which to move in with your furnishes no problem.. i went for a Crusade in the West Africa .
Pls i want you to note that,i am a kind and honest man and also i spent alot on my property that i want to give you for rent,i will want you to take absolute maintenance of my house and want you to treat it as your own,i,it is not the money the main problem but i want you to keep it tidy all the time so that i will be glad to see it neat when i come for a check up.
SO IF YOU ARE REALY INTRESTED I WILL WANT YOU TO FILL THE RENTAPPLICATIONS FORMS BELOWRENT APPLICATION FORM
Also,Pls let me get this answer. FIRST NAME:__________________MIDDLE NAME: _________________LAST NAME: __________________PROFESSION: ________________
HOME PHONE (____) __________(CELL)PHONE (____) __________
(WORK)PHONE (____) __________
KIDS _____ (YES/NO), HOW MANY ________
PRESENT ADDRESS: _____________________CITY: _______________STATE: ______________ZIPCODE: ____________
HOW LONG DO YOU INTEND STAYING? ____________
WHEN DO YOU INTEND MOVING IN? ______________
HOW SOON CAN YOU HAVE THE DEPOSIT PAYMENT SENT TO ME _______________
HOW SOON DO YOU WANT TO RECEIVE THE KEYS AND DOCUMETS OF THE HOUSE___________________________
DO YOU HAVE A PET: _____________NAME OF PET: _____________
KIND OF PETS: _____________DO YOU SMOKE? ______________
DO YOU DRINK? ______________
Looking forward to hear from you with all this details so that i can have it in my file incase of issuing the receipt for you and contacting you.Await your urgent reply so that we can discuss on how to get the document and the key to you,Note that the keys and documents of my house is with me here in west africa.please we are giving you the house base on trust and again i will want you to stick to your words,you know that,we do not see yet and only putting everything into Gods hand,so please do notl et us down in this our property and God bless you more as you do this..
HOUSE INFORMATIONADDRESS:2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067..This 4 bedroom, 2 bath home features a spacious remodeled interior, covered parking, and a large deck in the fenced backyard. New paint and refinished hardwood flooring. This home is served by Powers Ferry Elementary, East Cobb Middle, and Wheeler High Schools.
Bedrooms: 4
Bathrooms:2
Rent per month: $700
Deposit Req'd:700
Application Fee: $0
Parking: Reserved.
Available: Now
ADDRESS :2132 Sun Valley Dr SE Marietta, GA 30067
Pet policy: Ok
Smoking inside policy: no smoking
Lease terms: AS LONG AS YOU WHICH..
YOU CAN CONTACT ME ON +234-803-855-9566 Or 011-234-803-855-9566.
Thanks And God Bless You.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Pure Comedy
As a Charlatan, you are often privy to personal conversations. Well today, I had the most amusing conversation with one of my good friends about a certain female he knows. He summarized their earlier conversation and it went something like this:
Him: So how have you been?
Her: Fine, but I think I have depression. I've read this book and I have all the signs.
Him: Oh, well have you been to the doctor? After all, you're a lawyer.
Her: No, but I also have this condition where lack of sunshine causes a chemical imbalance.
Him: Umm, okay, so what are you going to do?
Her: Well, I have to buy this lamp that will replace the missing sunshine.
***Let's take a break here, how can anyone MISS sunshine, but I digress! LOL
Him: Umm, okay - and how much does that cost?
Her: about $300 a piece.
**** This is when I lost it. I couldn't take anymore - PURE COMEDY! Ma'am, are you sure it's the lack of sunshine that is causing the chemical imbalance? You, lady, and the self-diagnosis are UNSAVORY!
Part two---What does this UNSAVORY foolishness actually mean? I know there had to be a better way to word this statement.
"He has been consistently recruiting 500 executives, managers and technical professionals annually."
Him: So how have you been?
Her: Fine, but I think I have depression. I've read this book and I have all the signs.
Him: Oh, well have you been to the doctor? After all, you're a lawyer.
Her: No, but I also have this condition where lack of sunshine causes a chemical imbalance.
Him: Umm, okay, so what are you going to do?
Her: Well, I have to buy this lamp that will replace the missing sunshine.
***Let's take a break here, how can anyone MISS sunshine, but I digress! LOL
Him: Umm, okay - and how much does that cost?
Her: about $300 a piece.
**** This is when I lost it. I couldn't take anymore - PURE COMEDY! Ma'am, are you sure it's the lack of sunshine that is causing the chemical imbalance? You, lady, and the self-diagnosis are UNSAVORY!
Part two---What does this UNSAVORY foolishness actually mean? I know there had to be a better way to word this statement.
"He has been consistently recruiting 500 executives, managers and technical professionals annually."
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Who Knew?
If you are like the Unsavory Charlatans, you know plenty of people who work in some capacity for the Federal government. Well, imagine our suprise when we learned that for years, our friends and colleagues have been celebrating the WRONG holiday in February. For years, we have all enjoyed the "Presidents' Day Holiday" or the "Presidents' Day" sales, etc, and so on.
http://www.pocketdeal.com/deal-Macy's-President's-Day-Sale%5E7258.aspx
Yep, you've guessed it - FOR YEARS, YOU HAVE BEEN WRONG. Now the Unsavory Charlatans are left wondering - who's on first? According to the U.S. Code and the Office of Personnel Management in Washington, DC. The holiday was and still remains - George Washington's Birthday. You can now consider yourself informed. Stop indulging in those President's Day Sales and go chop down a cherry tree, for good ole' George!
http://www.opm.gov/Operating_Status_Schedules/fedhol/2009.asp
Monday, February 16* Washington’s Birthday
http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/5/6103.shtml
(a) The following are legal public holidays:
New Year’s Day, January 1.
Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr., the third Monday in January.
Washington’s Birthday, the third Monday in February.
http://www.pocketdeal.com/deal-Macy's-President's-Day-Sale%5E7258.aspx
Yep, you've guessed it - FOR YEARS, YOU HAVE BEEN WRONG. Now the Unsavory Charlatans are left wondering - who's on first? According to the U.S. Code and the Office of Personnel Management in Washington, DC. The holiday was and still remains - George Washington's Birthday. You can now consider yourself informed. Stop indulging in those President's Day Sales and go chop down a cherry tree, for good ole' George!
http://www.opm.gov/Operating_Status_Schedules/fedhol/2009.asp
Monday, February 16* Washington’s Birthday
http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/5/6103.shtml
(a) The following are legal public holidays:
New Year’s Day, January 1.
Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr., the third Monday in January.
Washington’s Birthday, the third Monday in February.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
We don't make this stuff up
Saturn is missing some of its inhabitants. You can't make this stuff up! I wonder what gave away that this idea could be a PROBLEM!
Lingerie Bowl Canceled Over Nakedness
The Boss' halftime show is safe. Lingerie Bowl VI has been canceled because of a dispute between the organizers and the nudist colony that was going to host the event. The game, which was supposed to air as a pay-per-view event during halftime of the Super Bowl, was sure to siphon off dozens of fans from the game. But the nudist colony wouldn't promise that its fans wouldn't show up in the buff, so the organizers called off the game.
LOL! You gotta love the Superbowl.
The explanation for the cancellation doesn't make a whole lot of sense, and seems to indicate that the Lingerie Bowl was headed for financial disaster. The game had struggled to find a place to play, and the players had not been happy about playing at a nudist resort.Because of all that, the "league" said it had no choice but to call it quits.
"The league will not place our fans, players, staff nor partners in a less-than-comfortable environment that would ultimately jeopardize the mainstream perception and reputation of the brand that so many have worked diligently over these past five years to build," the league's Stephon McMillen said. So yes, the organizers of a football game played by women in bras and panties were worried that the integrity and wholesome family atmosphere of their game would be ruined by having naked men and women in the stands. And somehow, they hadn't figured out that might happen when they signed up to have the game played at a nudist resort.
Lingerie Bowl Canceled Over Nakedness
The Boss' halftime show is safe. Lingerie Bowl VI has been canceled because of a dispute between the organizers and the nudist colony that was going to host the event. The game, which was supposed to air as a pay-per-view event during halftime of the Super Bowl, was sure to siphon off dozens of fans from the game. But the nudist colony wouldn't promise that its fans wouldn't show up in the buff, so the organizers called off the game.
LOL! You gotta love the Superbowl.
The explanation for the cancellation doesn't make a whole lot of sense, and seems to indicate that the Lingerie Bowl was headed for financial disaster. The game had struggled to find a place to play, and the players had not been happy about playing at a nudist resort.Because of all that, the "league" said it had no choice but to call it quits.
"The league will not place our fans, players, staff nor partners in a less-than-comfortable environment that would ultimately jeopardize the mainstream perception and reputation of the brand that so many have worked diligently over these past five years to build," the league's Stephon McMillen said. So yes, the organizers of a football game played by women in bras and panties were worried that the integrity and wholesome family atmosphere of their game would be ruined by having naked men and women in the stands. And somehow, they hadn't figured out that might happen when they signed up to have the game played at a nudist resort.
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